The story you’re about to hear in this 10 minute story is jaw-dropping in itself…but the story behind THIS story…is one not to be believed.
I had an amazing time performing for the International Women’s Art Salon at Dixon Place, NYC
To be perfectly honest, this is a new chapter for me. In less than a year, I’m married…and divorced sooner than I can even believe…in not the most tasteful way.(I’ll spare you the dirty details and leave that to XO Jane.)
I had been looking forward to performing a monologue at the ”Salon Lounge at Dixon Place: a monthly showcase of performance/literature/film-video by women.” After a sudden divorce once again made life take a detour, I didn’t even want to get out of the house – let alone take a few trains down to Delancey Street.
But I had something happen to me – a push that I needed.
I pushed myself to go to a Jewish 20s and 30s Shabbat Dinner…even if I’d rather cry to myself in my room.
But the truth was that I had done enough of that. And I wasn’t going to let some guy who once proposed to me, who I was just madly in love with, and now wouldn’t return one phone call, text or e-mail, ruin the rest of my life.
As much as I still loved him, he wasn’t worth it.
So I pushed myself to go to the city on my own.
Well, the leader of the Jewish dinner kind of shook me and said, “Amy, give me a break. You gave a TEDx Talk. Don’t tell me you can’t go to the city on your own.”
In theory, easy.
Without my husband, it was hard. A hard reality to now swallow. Even more than the devastation, is the confusion why he refuses to talk or return any mode of contact.
But I went.
Even more amazingly…I found the right address…all the way on Delancey Street!
Once I finally made it, I faced the empty stage. Another performance of many…but now as a newly, unmarried woman. It is a shift of awareness I am trying to get used to. It’s natural to miss someone you assumed had your back for life. You hear everyone else’s online dating horror stories, but you never think they can happen to you…until they do.
But I stood on that stage by myself, and I talked, and I sang. And I smiled. And I thought to myself.
And I felt deeply.
My monologue and song were followed by a beautiful poet Nicole Goodwin, who recited her own poems in honor of a friend who had died from breast cancer.
She quoted Sojourner Truth exclaiming, “Ain’t I a Woman?” and I felt a rush of power thrill my bones.
“Ain’t I a Woman?”
The answer is Yes. With or without this, that, him or her, yes I am a woman, as I am.
I am strong and vital.
I’m still a hopeless romantic.
On the train ride home, I even met some other strong, vital, and hopelessly romantic women and we had a good laugh with a sign that they happened to be carrying around…
I felt such a sense of power, returning home. And the next morning was a new start. Anything was possible. A new friend took me for a hike, and we saw the most beautiful mountain laurels in full blossom.
I am blossoming too. Like I always like to describe something or someone who has been shattered, and reassembling herself day by day, I am going to be a beautiful mosaic someday.
Broken and put back together again, but differently.
You know what. Life can suck. But with one foot in front of the other , life can go on. I never expected to get a divorce so soon.
But you know what?
Everything happens for a reason, and I already feel like I’m on the right track. I trust my detour...and Trust is a value that will always be there for me: trust for myself, and Trust for the path ahead, even if uncertain.
Trust the path, one foot in front of the other. With bold, bright beautiful ASICS of course.
Don’t let any obstacle let you lose your shine – a Detour is not a Dead End! [click to tweet!]