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“It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.”
― Ernest Hemingway

A Detour Is Not A Dead End…

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And it was also the subject of my TEDx talk this weekend!


If life’s taken you down an unexpected route, or “detour” then you’re a Detourist.

Odds are, you probably are a Detourist and don’t even know it.

Does life ever go the way we plan?  So when that planned-out path swerves in an unexpected direction, get upset, but then get on with it and keep traveling!

So this week, on Why Not Wednesday, I’m sharing the story of another inspiring Detourist – Lori!

My name is Lori Finnila and I’m a Detourist.


I had a detour when I thought after raising my son, though at times when raising him, that I would be the hero to it for sustaining such a long journey of battling single parenthood all the while trying to avoid a stalker/abuser. I could see the proud mom of a graduated son and the strength of a woman risen in height. All I had after risen to heights in character and profession of my own radio show empowering women was a body with a head held low, scrunched in a chair trying to find reality around me while fighting for my life. My abuser/stalker had caught up with me. And though I thought the final act would either be to death or rise, I had no idea it would be to such an incomparable physical state of being.

After being beaten so bad I couldn’t see the future anymore I had to tell my 14 year old son-who lost his dreams to our state university and any profession he had longed for in his mind at that moment, that I may die. No doctor had to tell me how my body was swaying in and out of consciousness as I slept. I began to talk to the Angels.

I learned not to fight, not that I didn’t want to, but because I couldn’t, anymore. I had to let a higher power take course. I explained to my son that parents have to stand in front of harm for their children and how much I loved him. I had always pushed him to situations to learn and to feel love from others.

But the fight didn’t end there. The Angels chose me to stay and I learned to live with my new self. The pieces still aren’t perfect: I have no intuition to go from anymore in my mind, my mind is weaker, my limbs are weaker (meaning less memory to creative projects, less or no piano or guitar to music, less dance), and I have to look to the Angels for guidance and assistance frequently. But I realize my gift.

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That is why I #LoveMyDetour.

Lori Finnila aka Lori Jean – Top Charts Singer and Songwriter – Award Winning Playwright – Sigma Tau Delta 

Thanks Lori!  Every story makes us stronger.

What’s the key to navigating a detour?

Gratitude and presence – that’s it. Just being thankful to be here, feeling whatever we’re feeling, in this very moment It’s a beautiful thing to be alive.

I call my “post-traumatic growth” my beautiful detour.  The blessings I’ve received just because these unfortunate events happened in my life are too large to quantify…or even start listing!

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Sometimes it’s tough to just come and and talk about difficult times. It’s hard to open up.  But we NEED to.  Why keep those memories locked up inside?  When we keep things in, we become lost.

But how to start?  That’s what ART is for.  Creativity is the best medicine!

There is an upside to every detour.  You just have to get through those rough detours to see those flowers along the path.  That’s the upside.  Don’t give up.  Keep going.  


Tell me what your detour’s been like on the #LoveMyDetour Facebook Page.

Or tag #LoveMyDetour on Twitter Instagram or Facebook.

Share your detour HERE!


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