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Originally written for BUST Magazine

rich levitt

As a bride, I had longed to feel beautiful and feminine or like a life-size Barbie doll complete with voluptuous, womanly curves. Now, I was wishing I had chosen December as my wedding month, just so I would have an excuse to bury myself in a huge, furry, winter-white cape.

The more magazines I browsed, the worse I felt. My self-contempt pushed me to the point where I started to believe that the man I was marrying was annoyed with me. Brandon was the most compassionate man and moreunderstanding than I was of my ostomies, the plastic bags attached to my body that collect waste. But every now and then I’d think to myself, “Don’t these bags bother him?  Can he feel them when he’s holding me?  Doesn’t he just wish I were…normal?”

Read the full article here.

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