“It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.”
― Ernest Hemingway
If life’s taken you down an unexpected route, you’re a Detourist.
Odds are, you probably are a Detourist and don’t even know it.
Does life ever go the way we plan? So when that planned-out path swerves in an unexpected direction, get upset, but then get on with it and keep traveling!
Need some proof that a detour leads to unexpected treasures? Check out my past Why Not Wednesday Detourists and get ready to be inspired – These amazing folks have turned their “detour” into an amazing opportunity. Now, I’m so excited for you to meet Jenny, a ridiculously strong Detourist.
My name is Jenny and I’m a Detourist.
I wasn’t one who thought I would find a soulmate love and end up married. Perhaps I thought this wouldn’t be within my life experiences because of the effects of chronic illness upon myself from a rare disease – Familial Adenomatous Polyposis. But I did find that love and I created a life with the man of my dreams. My dream, however, would turn into the unimaginable. Just as I didn’t expect to find myself married, I definitely didn’t expect to find myself divorced either.
Lies and mistrust entered my marriage while I wasn’t looking. I was blindsided by the depths of lies to cover our miscommunications. I felt betrayed and broken inside. I was left in a dazed confusion asking how this could have happened. The well of emotional trauma was a new level of pain I had never experienced previously. I spiraled into a severe depression. There were days I fought myself just to continue breathing. I was pushed to the brink emotionally and mentally – I was so desperate for solutions I wasn’t acting or thinking like myself. I became a shell of my former self. I fought the inevitable for a long time, using all the strength I had just to merely survive. And then I realized divorce was my only option if I wanted to be happy again.
One day, many months later I realized I had somehow navigated my way to discovering my own inner strength. I was surviving. I harnessed the strength that boiled deep within me. That old shell of my former self began to burn away, I was becoming a new person. A stronger person. I let go of the anger and the hurt, I let go of the fear and codependence. I woke up from my depression a vibrant, strong woman. The ability to be independent spurred me on in my self-transformation.
I realized I have a lifetime ahead of me, waiting for me and it is all mine to do what I want with it, not what others want. This is my life to create, not someone else’s. No longer shrinking to the will of another I am creating my life to my specifications. I am driven to set my own goals, my own standards and to achieve every single one of them on my own. I am empowered with fierceness and boldness. Enjoying my own independence has been incredibly freeing.
I became reacquainted with my inner voice and I now listen to her. I accept self-challenges for myself. Challenges I was too scared to commit to previously. I’m accomplishing more than I ever thought myself capable of before.
I learned that I no longer need to worry myself with the opinions of others, particularly those I no longer hold in high esteem. No longer will I submit myself to the power of others, to another’s malicious intent or manipulations. Instead, I’m cherishing the individuals I choose to surround myself with – the individuals who are strong themselves.
I learned to let go of the dangerous, personal issues of others. When an individual engages in deceptive, harmful behavior that is their behavior, not mine. Rather than trying to decipher their reasons and what I may have done wrong to deserve such actions against myself, I’m learning to let go. To let go of the pain that can be inflicted by others. I learned we don’t need to take on more pain simply because another is engaging in harmful behavior towards us.
I was pushed into a fire storm. It was a long process and I wasn’t able to see through the flames but I made it through to the other side. I may be smoldering, smoky, and scorched but I’m alive and I’m a better version of myself.
That is why…I #LoveMyDetour.
Jenny was diagnosed with familial adenomatous polyposis at age 8, and after six years with an ileostomy now has a straight pull-through. She has a master’s degree in social work and shares on her personal blog Life’s a Polyp. Check her out on Facebook, Twitter and Google+.
Your turn, Detourist!
Tell me about a time you turned a “wrong way” into the best trip of your life. You never know who you might inspire.
Or maybe you’re still waiting for your trip to be worth while. Keep traveling. You’ll get there.
I #LoveMyDetour. Now tell me why you love yours.
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